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You’ve probably heard it all before: all the amazing and wonderful (and condescending) ways you’ll grow when you have a baby. The new light that will shine upon you, brightening your whole world with a new bounty of knowledge and love only known to those who’ve been graced with the title of “mom” or “dad”.

There’s so much wrong with that, I can’t even begin to cover it, but one thing that’s on-point is that you will learn a lot from your little bundle of poop and spit up. It just may not be the ethereal sense of enlightenment you expected. In my (very limited) experience as a parent, these are just a few of the very important things I’ve learned:

Read More about Six Unexpected Things Your Baby Teaches You

Ah, the breast pump. A nursing mom’s best friend and worst enemy. On one hand, it gives us the option to continue breastfeeding when we go back to work, or when baby struggles with his latch, or any of the multitude of reasons that could otherwise prevent a mom from nursing. But on the other hand, it sucks (…see what I did there?). It’s uncomfortable, it’s time consuming, and it downright messes with your mind at times. Between watching the ounces creep along in the collection bottles while simultaneously watching the minutes of your life tick by in solitude, the inner monologue can be confusing, to say the least.

Read More about 31 Thoughts Moms Have While Pumping